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Status: Finished  |  Genre: Humor  |  House: Booksie Classic
a few words about personal hygiene

Submitted: November 10, 2018

A A A | A A A

Submitted: November 10, 2018



I gotta make moves

Among those are my bowels

I need something smooth

Not rough like paper towels

Call me a coward

But on an issue this tender

I surrender-I’m a huge toilet tissue expender


Employed to avoid hemorrhoids, Oh Boy!

The toilet’s destroyed yet I’m overjoyed

Wet wipes annoy me, why are they there?

They lack the power toilet paper packs per square

I got the facts; right here relax while I declare

The holy rolls sold in droves to derrieres

are abundantly clear, they’re not going anywhere

Saving lives when you go to fart and something else appears

I’m speaking on an item that is not to be shared

But in a pinch people will fight for that toilet papier


Pardon my French

And pardon my stench

I need some toilet paper

I can no longer clench

A necessary expense perhaps some people resent

but up against excrement, it’s money well spent

Worth every cent for each fleeting sheet

I have many sheets cause I take many sheets

Softer than fleece but not just offered to the lofty elite

Buffering cheeks in public when sprawled on the seat

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